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Archive for the ‘People Watching’ Category

There’s a personality type out there that I’m growing increasingly interested in. They’re quiet, introspective, and extremely observant. In the past I’ve written them off as completely uninteresting. I was putting a blanket of boring over them because they didn’t immediately engage in my loud and witty (or so I thought) conversation. Who has time to just observe when you could be jumping into every experience possible?

I’m a little older now and, I hope, a little wiser. I’m looking back at my checkered past and I tend to be drawn to the same type of person. Outgoing, possibly obnoxious, loud, and wears their opinions on their forehead even if their heart isn’t on their sleeve.

let me love you

Don’t run, I just want to know your life!

Recently, I met someone who was happier to stay in the background and observe rather than share every single one of his opinions about life. There were only a few of us in the group and normally I would take this opportunity to push, prod, and completely antagonize this type of person in an attempt to make them feel comfortable and draw them out of the their guarded shell (if you knew my mother you would understand that I would think this was completely reasonable). In reading and observing more about people’s personalities I’m realizing I have probably traumatized a good number of these poor introverts. Though I’m sure most of them avoid me like the plague I would like to formally apologize for any mental scars I may have left you with.

I want to assure all my introverts that I didn’t realize I was making you as uncomfortable as a claustrophobic person stuck in an elevator with a hoard of sumo wrestlers. I was simply trying to let you know that this was a safe place and you could feel comfortable to open up. Unfortunately I think the message I sent was, “RUN FOR YOUR LIFE, SHE WON’T GIVE UP, SHE WANTS TO KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU!”

Guys, I’m an extroverted person. I’m from New Brunswick for heaven’s sakes. Everyone knows everyone there and some of the first questions asked are, “Where are you from? Who are your parents? Are you married? What’s wrong with you, why aren’t you married?” Seriously, this is considered polite conversation. Yes, I moved about 16 years ago but that doesn’t mean my first instinct isn’t to delve into people’s personal lives.

I’ve realize the error of my ways however. I don’t know when I started to notice all the introverts. I guess I spent so much

Maybe if I don't move she won't see me...

Maybe if I don’t move she won’t see me…

time dating extroverts that one day I noticed the quiet person in the room and thought, ‘Huh, I wonder what they’re thinking.’

Also, a lot of my best friend’s are married to introverts. In fact, my current roommie, Bubbles, is engaged to one such introvert (congrats guys!). Before I had the privilege of meeting him personally I had heard he was very quiet and people couldn’t quite get a handle on him. This, of course, presented an exciting challenge; the opportunity to get to know someone that no one else could crack. This time I decided to change from my regular war tactics. Instead of jumping out of the bushes and screaming my war cry like a banshee I figured I would let him get comfortable around me. Eventually he would think I was just part of the scenery, not a dangerous creature who wanted to figure him out but someone who could be in the same room with him without trying to delve into his deepest, darkest, most terrifying stories. This of course would be classic misdirection, I wanted to know everything about him as soon as possible but I figured he would be much more likely to let me get close to this information if I seemed like I didn’t want it. If you would,  I would treat him like a cat. Act completely uninterested in him until he decided to come to me.

The result? It worked! Hot holy hell balls, it worked. I mean he didn’t tell me about the time his parents scared him for life but he did smile at me and he even talked a bit! And something else surprising happened, I was able to observe him as well. I gleaned insight into his steady character by just watching the way he observed others. He stayed close to my roommate but he enjoyed laughing at jokes, liked watching other people have fun, and he adored Bubbles. He looked at her like she was the most beautiful and amazing creature he had ever happened to stumble upon and he couldn’t believe he got to have his arm around her shoulders. It was beautiful. I liked him instantly.

Bubble’s fiance is now pretty comfortable around me. I don’t try to see what makes him cry and he doesn’t feel the need to shut down when he’s around me. It’s a good system.

Since this year is all about goals for me this is one thing I want to do more of. I want to give the introverts a chance to shine because the thing is, they do shine. In fact I would even say they shine the brightest once they trust you. They’re not always the easiest to get to know but they’re often extremely caring and really intuitive in ways you’d never imagine.

Life is all about changing in my opinion. We grow and learn every minute of the day, even when we don’t realize it. I can’t wait to find out more about all the quiet people. It might mean I have to change my tactics but I think they might be worth it.

<3

Thank you for reading beautiful people

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Reading has an amazing, transforming effect on public transit. I’m sitting on the street car engrossed in my second reading of Eat, Pray, Love and the once mildly full car has turned into an overflowing village of travelers.
The first thing I see when I glance up in surprise at the increase in bodies is a cute butt. I’m not normally a butt person but when a man has a nice butt a man has a nice butt and it would be rude not to notice. The second thing I notice is that this man has perfect, short, curly, ginger hair. Locks of healthy red hair band together to make perfect little Half rings. Beautiful.
I look down and when I glance back up the village has emptied somewhat and the curly haired man with a nice butt is standing directly In front of my chair.
He is more striking than I would have imagined. He has a short, ginger beard stretching across his jaw line and I want to reach out and touch it. The magic of the red heads wont let me look away and I glance up, like a child looking at a bowl of candy, eagerly and wide eyed. His eyes are crinkled in a smile that tells me he is texting someone he loves.  My heart warns at the laugh lines etched into the corner of his eyes and I pretend I can hear his melodious, rich laugh, because what else could it be but full of joy and depth?
He shifts and I see strong muscles in his back and again, come face to face with that derrière which now doesn’t seem to do his face justice. I watch him pick up his bag, noticing the logo on his khakis, and walk off the streetcar. In my minds eye I imagine he’s going to see his Bonny lass, the girl in charge of that smile and those laugh lines. I imagine they’ll lay together in bed tonight and she’ll entwine those lovely curls in her fingers, loving every strand. I imagine they’ll laugh and kiss and have a love that the rest of the world wishes they could taste, just once.
Good bye my lovely ginger, son of David, warrior and lover.

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